Kevlar for the Mind: Readers support change in condolence-letter policy - Off Duty, Military Health and Fitness - Navy Times

Kevlar for the Mind: Readers support change in condolence-letter policy

In my Feb. 4 column, I talked about the policy of the president and defense secretary not sending condolence letters to the families of troops who die by suicide in the war zones. I wrote that the policy is based on misinformation, bias and an outdated view of mental illness and suicide.

After the column was published, I received many phone calls and e-mails supporting my view that this policy needs to be changed. Here are some of those responses:

• “As a retired military officer of 30 years and a former suicide prevention officer, I spent much of my time brainstorming and implementing various measures designed to prevent suicide.

“I remember the controversy over commanders providing proper services to those soldiers who chose suicide as their way out. It was a very emotional topic for some, with some being [in favor of] treating them appropriately for their service and some wanting to totally shun them. I agree: Let’s do the right thing for the soldier, even if late.”

• “As someone who lost a friend to suicide, it angers me that our [government] looks at service members who die from suicide as second-class citizens.

“My friend fought for his country and our freedoms for nearly 20 years. He is no less of a man, Marine or friend because of how he died. To imply that he is by withholding a letter of sympathy is a slap in the face to me, his family, and the military.”

As a former Army officer and a psychologist, it’s difficult for me to imagine the rationale for withholding a condolence letter from the loved ones of any fallen service member.

One view in support of this practice is that “rewarding” the act of suicide by sending a letter would reinforce it and cause more service members to take their own lives by making the act seem honorable. I’m aware of no evidence that supports this claim.

It’s time to end this punitive and ill-advised practice. It’s time to remember all those who have fallen on the battlefield and do whatever we can to ease the pain and suffering of the loved ones left behind to deal with the loss.

You can make a difference. Let those in power know how you feel and let’s stand together to bring an end to this issue.

To send a message to Defense Secretary Robert Gates, you can contact: Geoff Morrell, Assistant Secretary of Defense for Public Affairs, 1400 Defense, Pentagon, Washington, DC 20301-1400.

You can also make your feelings known to President Obama at http://www.whitehouse.gov, and to your representatives and senators at http://www.house.gov and http://www.senate.gov.

For more information on suicide, go to http://www.apa.org.

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Bret A. Moore is a board-certified clinical psychologist who served two tours in Iraq. E-mail him at kevlarforthemind@militarytimes.com. Names and identifying details will be kept confidential. This column is for informational purposes only and is not intended to convey specific psychological or medical guidance. Readers should see a mental health professional or physician for mental health problems.